FUBAR.

Sorry, but this whole thing is just bizarre. Who's to say in another few days we won't be seeing a headline, "Chinese government accused of claiming cardboard buns story fake, to assuage concerns over Chinese food imports. I mean really, can you believe anything you read in the news? Probably not. Not even the first sentence in this headline. But that last sentence is safe to believe."

"I couldn't believe that they all fit in my stomach."

I don't know what else there is to say.

Let's take a moment to revisit one of the best videos of all time

Fatboy Slim / "Weapon of Choice":

Breaking news

First, I swear that day 5 will be forthcoming shortly. Sorry!

But I would just like to inform you of this hilarious happening. I went to cnn.com (why do I still do that?) and I saw this headline: 5 die in dairy farm manure pit. Okay, the deaths are not hilarious. What is hilarious is that when I glanced at the headline, I read it thusly: "5 die in hairy armpit maneuver."

Soon, day 5, I promise. But some (catmonster, I'm looking in your direction. Also, Cypress Hill.) have been even more delinquent!